In my opinion, there are few things more dangerous to your personal growth and happiness than deciding that your happiness depends on someone or something other than you. Through the ages, we as a people have grown so much in so many ways. But, and I can say this because I am technically a "Millennial", there was one huge error. If you look at the difference between the 50's and now, kids had more respect and were taught to work their guts out, because the world didn't owe them anything. The following are the fallacies I have noticed that we as a millennial general suffer from as a whole.
Lazy Work
As a country, we have so much more at our fingertips than people did back then, and that technology and knowledge allows to work smarter and not harder (which is what the financial gurus strongly encourage from time to time). While I understand the benefits of this philosophy, it can be rather like a gateway drug, if you will, to laziness. I have worked with so many intelligent people, that I get so stoked about because they get it, just really get it, and then they shock me one day when they take a huge shortcut, that had way more risks associated than benefits. What I can't stand about these types of people is that they start with small risks, and they usually come out alright because they got lucky or they can talk their way out of trouble. Then, they take those "Wins" as a sign that they are invincible on some level, so they feel more comfortable taking bigger risks. Eventually they crash hard and it completely catches them off guard because they felt so in control of the situation. Bottom line is: The best combination of qualities to try to acquire are Knowledge AND wisdom. If you only have wisdom, then you'll make great decisions, but you won't know how to actually follow through with them. But as a culture, we have everything right at our fingertips, we can find pretty much anything without working too hard for it. If you are hungry, there's a McDonalds 3 blocks away. If you're hot, you can go to a pool down the road. If you're sad, there are aisles and aisles of wonderful, heart-attack inducing foods that will provide you with a band aid for the time being.
Responsibility
I've definitely seen this one - people spending their money and stuff they don't need, then begging for what they really need. But this cannot all be blamed on the individual. I say that not to provide a scapegoat, but to understand the origin of where these behaviors seem to come from, and more importantly, figure out a way to break free. In school, how many of us were taught how to use a credit card? Anybody? Buehler? Well, I definitely didn't, and I've never met anyone who did, so if your school taught you that, that is awesome, tell them great job! Our generation as a whole, didn't grow up with a whole lot of knowledge on credit and loans and all of that junk, albeit important junk, you need to understand when you become an adult. But kids these days - if they want to go to college but they can't afford it, they take out student loans. If they can't buy groceries - they live off of their credit card or student loans. I know not all students are like this, but there are many different variations of this "Bail me out" routine. In my opinion, a huge part of this stemmed from this movement, around the 90s-2000s, that claims "This is who I am, I won't change for anyone." This movement came from a very great place and made a huge difference in the overall confidence of our generation when we were vulnerable teens trying to figure out who we are. But, as it usually happens, something not-so-healthy started. The very confident statement of saying you are comfortable with who you are, and you don't need to change your personality just because you want others to accept you -- slowly became "I am me, and I will not change, and you just need to cram it." Which became a scapegoat for people who were rude, inconsiderate, etc. Why change who you are? Because we are human beings who are growing older, more wrinkly, and hopefully wiser. Because to succeed in anything in life, you need to be willing to adapt and evolve. Because as a human race who from time to time interact with other people, we have to be willing to pick our battles, compromise, and try to be tolerable, in exchange for the same courtesies extended back to us. We are an evolving species - period. Now, should people tell you how you should change and force you to be like them? Of course not. But the very statement that you do not need to change who you are, can be dangerous, if only to your subconscious, because you are telling yourself this, and your mind does what you tell it to do. At the time when we are at our laziest, most entitled, and selfish as a country, you can still make the decision to be more, to glue your head to your shoulders and be a responsible adult, because it is the most logical thing to do and will improve your relationships with others.
Boredom
This one is pretty simple. I feel so bad for kids these days, because they have everything they could ever want. WHAT? What did I just say? Isn't that the dream? No, it's not. Kids have Tablets, Iphones, computers, with access to social media, search engines, videos, games, pictures, anything you could ever want. They can sit in a waiting room and entertain themselves for hours if they needed to. What is sad about that? What's sad is that they don't know how to be in the present moment. They never just get to sit in silence and look around the room at their surrounds and people they're sitting next to. The other part of it is, the day they forget their phone at home, is the worst day ever, because they don't know what to do with themselves. They are constantly stimulated and so going without it is torture. It's like that with everything. If people want something greasy to eat, there are at least a dozen places that will happily fulfill that request, and usually within three minutes, because heaven forbid we are kept waiting. I have been in this whirlwind, and it's not a fun place to be. You're constantly having to have something in the background, you can't drive in the car without music, working in silence is torture because it's so boring, it's hard to fall asleep if it's silent. Being in that whirlwind and then trying to train your brain to really be in and experience the present moment and interact with people who are there with you, is REALLY hard, even as an adult. Imagine how much harder it is for a kid that doesn't have the self discipline or the right frame of mind yet. Kids are constantly stimulated at home and then sent to school where their teachers expect them to sit in a chair, be quiet, and work. This is torture! Do we change the schools to make them more stimulating? No, we teach and show children how to live in the moment that they're in, and teach them how to be social and interact with others. As I stated above, we are all on this planet together, and occasionally have to interact - give kids a good foundation of social intelligence.
My parting thought is that we, as the newer generation are capable of SO much, let's be honest. But we also need to draw some of our wisdom from our elders, because they got this fair and did pretty well. They were taught to work for what you want, to not settle because it's easier, to not quit because you're tired. The more our generation can work on our social and emotional intelligence, the more amazing we can be and we can actually reach our full potential.
